Oregon

I Did It…

Posted on by oahuzer0

I start everyday with an alarm. Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture plays until my sleep filled eyes can find the snooze button. But then, the morning lifts me up and pushes me out the door to start my day. I lived the entirety of my life searching for that snooze button, with little enthusiasm if any for a job that I HAD to go to. Behind these waking eyes I had a dream, although nothing so grand as Dr. King but from my heart nonetheless and as most things that should be it became a relentless need to one day become a reality. I get to brew beer.

It started as simple as any other obsession. A friend extends an invitation to come over and brew a beer in his garage as if we were a high school band rehearsing punk versions of boy band songs… which of course is just a hypothetical example and needs no further evaluation. With brewing beer came drinking beer, and with drinking beer came the “what ifs” and the “we shoulds”. After the “Yeah, that’ll happens” and the beers were consumed we put our labor of love to bed in its fermenter and ventured home to find that snooze button for another day. Little did I know that our little garage rehearsal would change the trajectory of my life to my every morning Tchaikovsky snooze and smile.

Years passed and the time spent as a retail slave had stretched me thin literally and figuratively, so the time had finally come to stick my neck out and get this dream moving. Like anything worth doing, this was not the easiest thing to make a reality. After some outright cold shoulders and near misses my spirit was taking quite the beat down, so I took what I could get in the industry in distribution. Not the dream, more like a mirage, but like all things in the pursuit of greatness I was to treat it like a learning experience that would hopefully lead to the ultimate goal. It did not. Like a forgotten flapjack my dream was pushed to the back burner while I destroyed my body for the distribution of one of the big three that shall not be named, and if you think I was ashamed to pedal such wares then you would be correct. But we do silly things in the search for something true, something real. Like retail, distribution was not for me and eventually was no longer an option, so I left.

As the years ticked by the dream would peek its head out from time to time and would lead us to massively sauced sessions of beers, brewing, and battlestar galactica. Memories were made and wiped on those days, and the dream was fed big plump virgins so that it would one day live. Surprising successes like my jalapeño scotch ale called Rowdy Roddy Pepper to my almost great but ultimate failure in The GIMPerial IPA made everything very real, the good and the bad. Real is the enemy of ambition, and if you let it, can be the reaper of that dream. My dance with the reaper has been a long and slow ass grabber under the mirror ball and strobe lights but in the end I persevered. No means no you reaping sumumabitch.

What did I do you might ask? As fate would have it, as the distribution door closed, the door of hope cracked open to let this fly in. A couple job postings at breweries and my fingers never worked as fast on an application as they did that day. I would have been happy with either job, and that’s pure honesty, but if I’m being completely transparent there was one that I was hoping for more than the other. I was called in for a “working interview” to one of my favorite breweries in Oregon. What the fahk is a “working interview” I thought, but was nonetheless ready, willing, and able to do whatever it took to prove to them and more importantly myself that this was what I was meant to be doing. As interviews go I have to say, best one ever. We brewed a beer. Like all those years ago in my buddies garage and every backyard batch in between we added grain to water, hops to boiling wort, yeast into fermenter, and pride swelling in my chest. I was asked what I thought and with restrained jubilation I got the words out that it was everything I hoped it would be. To which my future boss told me that the job was mine if I wanted it. The responses in my head were both loud and vulgar, but I managed to get out a composed acceptance of the position. I sat in my car in disbelief where someone must have been cutting onions, and immediately let the important people in my life know of what just happened. The first step has finally been taken towards the dream. I get to tap the snooze button every morning with a smile. I get to climb into my car, drive to a brewery and open the door with my key. I get to start my day brewing beer. Dammit, is someone cutting onions again?

Great Notion, A Great Love

Posted on by oahuzer0

Portland. Where the weird thrive and the beer flows like wine. Any walk around this beautiful city will yield you an infinite array of culinary delights and wonderful spectacle. It is one the few cities in the country that has the honor of being called “My Happy Place” and with so much as 15 minutes lost in its abnormally clean city streets it just might become one of yours as well. If on your walkabout you stumble across Great Notion Brewing then do yourself a flavor (that’s right, I said flavor) and stumble inside. You might find the piece of your heart that you’ve been missing.

While the hazy IPA scene is East Coast dominated this Oregon house of hops and glory is making a case for supremacy, and in this debate, haters gonna hate while the lovers gonna love. I have had my liver liberally doused in the likes of Other Half, Trillium, Tree House, among others and can say without any hesitation that Great Notion holds a candle to the east coast behemoths and sets them on fire. I have no guilt in roasting my marshmallows on that fire and parading my s’mores in front of my east coast brethren. So let me take a minute, or many and try to put into words the depth of my adoration for the copious mouthfeels and Disney-like glee I get when I find my seat at their Alberta brewpub. Where the beers are a plenty and the food gives you chest pains… #worthit

So lovingly printed on their cans is the credo “With a Passion for Hops and the Patience for Sour”, which translates to the thirstiest of Uprighticans as a promise to satisfy, not only the lupulin painted palates but the jaw tightened thrill seekers of sours as well, and everything in between. And when I say everything, I’m not just whistling Dixie, mainly because I have no idea what that means, but also because whenever I visit my home away from home I tend run the gamut on the tap list. They serve up breakfast in the form of Double Stack pancakes, a big sumumabitch of a stout brewed with enough maple syrup to give you the diabeetiss and whole bean Sumatra from Clutch Coffee Roasters to keep you buzzzing through the sugar surge. At 11% ABV you’ll be happier sooner than later and feeling no guilt for having pancakes before noon. No shortage of healthy options if you are in the mood for something juicy. Juice Box, Juice Jr, Space Invader, and voted one of the best IPA’s in Mrrrica… Ripe IPA, all take your palate to the farmer’s market for a fruit filled basket of “F@%k Yeah!”

I’m gonna need something to get a little more emotional about so my next lips smacking libation must be a sour. I gaze upon a menu item that might as well have been lit with fireworks. Blueberry Muffin? Yes please. Take a whiff, reflect, tell me where you are right now. I am smack dab in a bakery or in a country kitchen neck deep in muffins a la blueberry, and I mean spot on. Sips turn to puckers, and empty glasses turn to smiles as it goes down with ease and elation. Truly a singular experience and one of my favorite sours, period. Until… these maniacal expectation destroyers decide they want all their eggs in one can, so they haze up a strawberry sour, or maybe they sour up a hazy IPA, either way they do it, and in doing so claim my liver for their own. The Luminous v.03 was a journey. Sweet and tart, hazy and refreshing, drink and drunk. If I had a third eye, it would have been a flood with tear. We’re talking Bambi’s mom dying, Rose letting Jack sink to the bottom of the ocean, stub your toe on the coffee table tears. I will forever yearn for that beer, no shame.

Give me the time and I will peel back the layers of love for this pot of gold at the end of my own personal rainbow. But I don’t have that kind of time. Time is wasted if you’re not at least dreaming about visiting this Portland house of hops and happiness. I don’t waste time anymore. I drown in it.

Reflections, My Craft Beer Year

Posted on by oahuzer0

Another year comes and goes, and the ever changing world of craft beer delivers copious moments of glee, disappointment, and the occasional “meh”. Expectations were high. The status quo is an often looked upon bad word with breweries fighting tooth and nail to stand out amongst the emerging and in some cases the declining. We have been blessed with an over abundance and it has been my genuine pleasure to over indulge. As I sift through the hazy memories (pun not intended, but pun totally nailed) I can’t help but be optimistic that this train has no intention of slowing, and I’m setting up shop on the tracks. So where to start?….

The Tried and True Award

One thing that all enthusiasts appreciate is consistency. How many times have you been at the bottle shop and been stumped? What are we having tonight? This is the “First World Problem” of too many to choose from that it becomes difficult. So thank the beer gods for the no brainer, the always a good choice, like warm apple pie go-to beer/brewery that damn near guarantees smiles as opposed to the status quo “meh”. Locally here in Eugene you can go no wrong with anything from Ninkasi Brewing. Their staples are as good as they were when I first laid these lips upon them and their seasonal/special releases like Ground Control and the Megaladom give me the fizz in my special liver parts. Oh yes, they are special…

Favorite Beer Fest(s)

Still haven’t made it to a GABF, sue me. But I have made my way through the crowds of the massively lubricated and I can’t say that it wasn’t a fantastic time. A bucket list destination for me was Drake’s Brewing’s Hopocalypse Day and it did not hesitate to demolish my expectations. Mythical beers like the whale of a brew, Black Label Hopocalypse was my entire focus, and no one, not Ninkasi herself could have kept me from acquiring the “One Beer” to rule them all. I told my crew that they could come with me if they wanted but I was heading straight to the line to get my bottles. They came with, cuz… you follow obsession when it leads to oblivion it seems. I got my bottles and proceeded to douse my liver in a tsunami of hops and smiles provided by the Bay Area’s finest. It was a good Hopocalypse…

I would not be able to forgive myself if I didn’t mention my favorite Oregon beer fest. The Bend Brewfest was a spectacle of epic proportions. You know all of the stories you hear about Oregon beer? Put all of that in a field of tents, taps, and tokens and say goodbye to your friends and loved ones, because you’re home, in craft beer heaven. Rest In Pieces…

Biggest Surprise Beer

My liver is spoken for. When I yearn for beer the first brewery that comes to mind is Great Notion Brewing out of Portland, OR. Those who know, yearn with me. Those who don’t, I pity you. I found myself spending hours driving to the brewery just for a chance to pick up my allotment of cans for one of their Saturday releases, but what I was not prepared for was the mind f@&k that their sour IPA Luminous v.03 was about to unleash. This was a gateway beer to obsession. Strawberry, hops, haze, tart, eyes wide open and with a solitary tear of elation streaming down my cheek. I told others, “You have to try this!” They would ask if I could send them a can. I could not. I was not willing. And now I yearn. Is this my karma? So be it. I would do it all again. If you know then you understand, and if not… then I pity you.

Biggest Disappointment Beer

This one hurts. The first beer I remember loving was the Punkin Ale from Dogfish Head out of Delaware and the long distance affair has been strong throughout the years, however my affections have apparently wavered (as of this year anyways). Let me be clear, my heart is still strong for the Head of Dogfish, but when something you depend on gives you less than what you expect after years of dependability then it hurts on a much deeper level. The beer was good. Please do not let this rant say anything else if not that, but I have been accustomed to great when it comes to Sam and Co. I pray the punk rocks its way back into the light of praise this year. If not? I can live with a broken heart…

Best Beer of the Year

Astoria, OR is known for a few things. First, a little film called The Goonies. Ever hear of it? Second, Arnold insisted to his kindergarten class that it indeed was not a tumor. And most importantly, Fort George Brewing has been pumping out amazing brews that would cause any truffle shuffling adventurer seek them out. Their yearly collaboration beer, the 3-Way IPA always promises justified hype with the year before being the coming together of minds from Great Notion and Rueben’s Brews. So the follow up had some pretty big glasses to fill, and fill they did. They brought in SoCal innovators Modern Times and Seattle’s beer equivalent to a religious experience in Holy Mountain Brewing for this last years 3-Way and proceeded to make sweet, sweet love. This one, I was less stingy with and spread it far and wide, the way a 3-Way should be. I can’t wait for this years collab as I sit with these dirty thoughts.

Best Brewery

What do you consider a great brewery? Is it all about the people? Is it the beer that pumps its way into our glasses and helps us forget? Is it the atmosphere, the ambiance, what the French call a certain… I don’t know what? I don’t know Lloyd, the French are assholes, and I know how Great Notion Brewing out of Portland made its way into mine, and the hearts of many. There’s almost nothing worse for an ex-punk-ish hombre than the status quo, lemmings off a cliff, “lets do what everyone is doing” attitude, so it was indescribably refreshing when a brewery was doing hazy IPA’s, big stouts, and juicy sours with little regard to the norm. They’re tap lists on whatever day you may visit reads like a Willy Wonka wet dream. In the mood for pancakes? Brownies? Passionate for passion fruit? Enjoy hazy days on the citrus train? Like puckering them cheeks? All are welcome here to drink as you please with not a dilly dilly in sight. You’re going to drink a bit, more than likely a few liquid refreshments will pass through our lips to liver, and the menu is a smorgasbord of heart stopping munchies to soak up stout to sour. It’s nothing if not exciting for me as I approach the doors and find my seat. This place makes me feel like I am winning at life, and lets face it, we all need that as often as we can get it.

Most Anticipated Beer

There are beers that we look forward to coming out every year. Pliny the Younger is a yearly obsession that I will be happy to indulge until the well runs dry or nuclear Hopocalypse claims us all. KBS, B-Bombs and Dark Stars, Hunahpu’s, Bourbon County (you damn well know you look forward to that one too), and many more that have become old reliables will hit shelves for minutes if that, but what I find myself frothing at the mouth for are perched safely in my own cellar. Bottles of puckering Rare Barrel, de Garde greatness in great abundance, stouts and barley wines and sours, oh my. But the holy grail for hop heads takes up the most coveted shelf space. I’m talking about the copious amounts of 120 Minute IPA’s dating back to 2011 waiting for vertical consumption. Granted we are two years off from what promises to be the vertical to end all verticals, but I cant help but feel the excitement in the now. I imagine it will happen on the annual trip to The Bay for my Pliny, which those days will make for stories we will tell our grandchildren, if we can remember of course… or survive.

Claim 52 Brewing

Posted on by oahuzer0

Unless you are not hip to the beer trends of the industry then you must have had a New England style IPA by now. Or maybe you’re one of those dirt water swilling freaks that preaches “domestic” superiority for the Three That Shall Not Be Named. And by the way, there is nothing more domestic than a local brewery putting out craft beer that was brewed down the street from your house. That’s like, literally domestic. But anyway, the hazy IPA is here, spreading like a colony of feeding yeast, and every brewery is having a go at what used to be exclusively an East Coast thang. To be honest, it appears that they are missing the mark when compared to the likes of Other Half, Treehouse, LIC, and the plethora of other East Coast breweries, to which I should point out that there has been no comparison, until now…

I am no authority here. I am just a fortunate Upright Drunkard who has swam in the spectrum of the many legit and bogus. My understanding of this relatively new IPA style is based on the mass consensus and my own personal research (nights of many lined up hollow vessels that were home to the haze), so when I wrapped my lips around a West Coast brewery doing something I have only experienced from the other side of the country then I was immediately skeptical, intrigued, confused, introspective, and delighted. The brewery that cracked the code was Claim 52 Brewing out of Eugene, OR (pause for collective scoff and disbelief)…

The first hazy concoction that caught my attention was their Kickin’ Jeans IPA (8/10 on the UrD scale). The advertisement poster for this brrr was a couple of people in Canadian tuxedoes doing Chuck Norris style kicks. Yeah, I am going to order that. It was one of the first times I remember a citrus smack in my palate complimented by a perfect hop presence. Hazy and citrusy, solid and fluid, drink and drunk. Only on tap, I went back three days later for more with the impression that this brew was an anomaly, something special that was the closest thing to the likes of Other Half on this side of the land, and I wanted it before it was gone forever. Little did I know, Claim 52 was just getting started…

Then along came Fluffy. If my heart was broke into a million pieces, Fluffy (8.75/10 UrD scale) could glue it back together. There was a sense of relief after my first mass consumption of it, knowing that I didn’t have to agonize over whether or not I had to wheel and deal for east coast citrusy libations. It was here, down the street from my home, and I felt like I had won. Not a prize. Not a lottery. Through all the BS in the world, I had just won at life. And with the way the world seems to always shine a brighter light on the winners, Claim 52 pumped out Dances With Hooves, Super Salad, Cryo Fluffy, and Goats In Pajamas. Not a typo, Goats. In. Pajamas. All amazing, and all winners.

If you can do no wrong then why not push the boundaries a bit more. That’s what important brewers are known for, being restless, a “so what’s next?” attitude that breeds greatness. They decided to give us their version of the milkshake IPA, which to be honest, had me in fear that they were sinking their own ship. They did not. Purple Panda came out of nowhere and while it wasn’t an identical interpretation of a Tired Hands milkshake IPA it was distinctly their own, and it was thoroughly satisfying (8.75/10 UrD scale). They followed PP up with Bird Up, Snail Down, Teaches of Peaches, and their holiday treat in Jolly AF that put me in a sugar cookie coma that I long for to this day. The beer, not the coma… maybe.

When it all comes down to it, the search for the best beer often doesn’t result in you finding it, but it finding you. The case being made for one of my all time favorite Claim 52 beers when I stumbled fortuitously into the brewery on the most fortunate of whims to find Private Eyes. Clicking all the boxes for the hazy IPA it cemented their status in my mind and liver as the one of the premier NE IPA producers, not just in Oregon, not just the west coast, but period. I bought what I could afford, and went back for more on payday. A great beer keeps you coming back, and back I came, and kept coming. 9/10 UrD scale.

I tend to gush. When something infects your heart then that tends to happen, and I give myself completely to it as that is how I am built. This place is deserving of my adoration and I pass that enthusiasm on to anyone and everyone who will listen and enjoy a beer with me. And at the end of that conversation and hopefully many many empty glasses, there’s more love in the room for your life and this brewery that provides the canvas for better possibilities. Sounds a lot like hope and optimism, doesn’t it?

Reflections, Another Year In Craft Beer…

Posted on by oahuzer0

The craft beer world changed this year. We witnessed our hearts breaking and the fall from grace of one of our favorite breweries in Wicked Weed with the selling to AB InBev. We also saw the retaliation from the craft world with the “Independent” movement in the wake of the sale in the form of the label signifying breweries as such, or as the Three-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named saw it, a big middle finger attacking them for doing nothing wrong. Nothing indeed. You know what you did… Anyway, this year I saw myself taking a step back from massive consumption and trying to focus on quality and the rare. That went out the window pretty quickly and the focus turned to whatever I could get from the east coast. That followed through the aforementioned window soon after and the focus was then supporting local. Mix that all together and you get the craft beer drinker we have today.

So this year I have decided to go about this whole categorized awards thing differently and soon after, throw it all out the window. So again, here are some of my opinions, my experiences, my favorite moments, and even some heartbreak. Here are my reflections…

Favorite Tradition

I have yet to make it to a GABF, or do a brewery tour of Brooklyn, but I have made it a mission over the past few years to make the journey to the Bay Area for the release of a beer that along with the brewery has a special place in my heart, deep in the cockles, Pliny the Younger. Nothing like braving the early morning frost of a Bay Area February in order to be in line for first wave sips of what has become one of my favorite beers ever. Is it one of my favorites because of its exclusivity? Because of its cult like following, or perhaps its ability to seriously impair your good decision making skills? Or maybe it’s actually just that damn good, and as with all good beers is even better when shared with friends over great food. That’s a trip to Russian River Brewing in a nutshell, and I am one big nut.

Biggest Surprise Beer

The landscape of amazing beers produced many oohs and ahs this year, but are there any that I still dream about, even long for? Okay, there are quite a few but one above all stole the show this last summer. Fort George out of Astoria, OR gave us their highly anticipated collab beer, the 3-Way IPA. The collaborating breweries being Great Notion out of Portland and Reuben’s Brews out of Seattle and boy did they ever collab! GN and FG have been able to corral the nuances of the New England style IPA better than most and gave the west coast a dream of what they have been missing. This beer stacked up toe to toe with the likes of Other Half and Tree House like it was a real contender. Cue “Eye of the Tiger”…

My Favorite Beer(s) of 2017

Okay, so asking a guy what his favorite beer is might be like asking him to narrow down his favorite breath of air, so as it happens I cannot bring myself to pick just one. First stand out that took my liver away was Mylar Bags from Other Half. In a lineup of outstanding east coast hop juice, on a frosty night in Poulsbo, WA, everything was beginning to run together. Other Half, Trillium, Tree House, all the heavy hitters and there was only so much my palate could take… or so I thought. The hazy beast was poured and the aromas popped like a citrusy dream with an army of hops to conquer my soul. Something perfect about this beer, and I like me some perfect.

Then there was this whole milkshake IPA thing. Skeptical I was. But then I was fortunate enough to win in a game of chance, much like Jack in Titanic, a ticket that would change my life. For the better in my case (I still maintain that there was plenty of room on that floating door) and I was blown away by the Extra Vanilla Double Milkshake by Tired Hands. A mouthful to say, and an even better mouthful to… fill your mouth with? As I expected, my tastebuds were a-flurry with confusion at first, but with each succeeding sip the layers peeled back every detail until they all came together in a cacophony of harmony and discord. The vanilla mellowed the hops and vice versa like a dance on my palate which resonated long after the can and glass went dry.

Biggest Disappointment

This is hard. A gut check to my morales and maybe even a calling out of my craft beer ideology. I, because of this one vice, am a hypocritical lump on the log of a conflicted belief system that I will defend forever, and compromise when it suits me. The beer that causes such an unrest within is Goose Island’s Bourbon County Brand Stout. To be clear, my disappointment is not with the beer but with myself. Not because of the beer, which is the pioneering bourbon barrel aged stout that is nothing if not consistently awesome, but because of its affiliations. The business practices of Goose’s parent company are deplorable, instilling actual outward frustration and even anger. So why do we flock every Black Friday to find our allotments worth if we do not support where it is coming from? I don’t have an answer. I don’t have the logical reasoning to support my actions. What I do have is my shame, and nothing drowns shame better than a BCBS…

Best Brewery

Let us not bicker. Let’s understand that we all have our sentimental attachments to both the local and abroad. So it makes sense to highlight both, in my opinion of course, and state the drunken obvious. Let’s be real. No “Best Brewery” conversation can be had without bringing up Other Half out of Brooklyn. And rightfully so. Their growth in popularity is undeniable. Their dedicated drinkers are also campers (lining up the night before for a chance to score some sweet cans is fanatical). And the excitement that I have experienced after receiving beer mail of these beautifully hazy concoctions is just about unrivaled. They get it. They obviously love what they do which shows in their product and their rabid fanbase. There’s legitimate love there, and I’m not afraid to admit it.

Locally, I have been smitten. I am in deep smit. Claim 52 out of Eugene, OR has been consistently raising my eyebrows in delight for the course of a year or so. Like Other Half they have a focus on the New England style of brewing, and dare I say do it just as well, if not better at times than some east coasters. Home is where the heart is, and my heart is cemented in the foundations of that amazing house of hops. All I can say is thank you…

Most Anticipated Beer

I have made it a mission in my craft beer life to obtain and consume those beers that I once thought not possible to obtain, the whales if you will. Like Joe Dirt says, you can’t have “no” in your heart. So what do I want, nay, need this year? There in lays the problem. Everything is at the fingertips of the modern craft beer drinker and trader so the exclusivity factor has taken a major hit. Exclusivity makes a beer taste better. Call me a liar. Something you had to search out, pay up the wang for, fight, claw, do unmentionable things in truck stop bathrooms for always tastes of victory. So allow me to crave for an experience over “a” beer. The Great American Beer Fest is my new “White Whale”. One beer? More like I’m gonna need another liver. It’s the top of the mountain, and I can’t wait to take in the view. Maybe I’ll see some of you there? I’ll be the only drunk crawling on the ground, somehow, still Upright. Cheers you silly suds!

A Beer For Everyone…

Posted on by oahuzer0

I believe that somewhere out there, a beer exists that suits the stingiest of palates. I hear it all the time, “I don’t like beer” or the even more prejudicial “I’m not a beer person”. A beer person? Am I offended or just confused? I take a step back and realize that they are basing their entire outlook about beer on the big three (known as the Three-who-shall-not-be-named) and now feel obligated to educate them about the wonders, nay, the wonderment, nay, the wonderfulness, nay, the one bottle night night time experiences of the craft beer world. I’m about to Miyagi/Obi-Wan the heck out of you…

Let’s start with the easy nibble on my line, the sweet tooth and coffee drinkers. If you can’t start your day without your grande mocha-choca-frapabullshit then I have something for you that will be sure to please, the stout. No, I’m not calling you fat, but to be honest if you were on a steady diet of dark beers then you could be on the fast track to “festively plump”, but there’s nothing wrong with that now, is there? The stout has the characteristics of that morning decadence that you survive the day by, with coffee aromas and palate tingles that put you right at home on an early Sunday. A well done stout is a starting point for rampant manipulation such as, the addition of the classic vanilla which gives it a rich sweetness that should make the fufu coffee drinker extremely contented, the use of chocolate that more or less turns this beer into dessert, the aging in Bourbon barrels that lends a boozy burn that can be lovingly described as elegant, and of course the addition of actual coffee that will wake you up with just as much ease as your bubbling pot of black crude. I’m barely scratching the surface of where the stout has gone so take a risk and give some a try. Observe the different mouthfeel’s, boozy burning sensations, sweet dances of flavors about your taster, and enjoy an actual beer.

Maybe you like something with a juicy disposition. I am very fond of a brunch time mimosa so I get the appeal of an alcoholic beverage that you can drink before noon with little to no guilt. The newest craze in the industry right now is the New England style IPA which is characterized by its hazy appearance and up front fruit palate. It even looks like a cup of OJ most of the time so you won’t get those judgmental looks when you have one with breakfast… or lunch if you had a bunch of “juice” the night before and wake up a little later than usual. These NE IPA’s have been toyed with now by brewers and can satisfy just about any palate whether it’s someone craving citrus, or even something a little more decadent, like a milkshake! Yes, now there are “milkshake” IPA’s that in my experience push the envelope further than ever expected. They start off in a cacophony of flavors that are difficult to decipher, but after each adoring sip the distinction becomes clear as each ingredient starts to shine before they soon harmonize into a singularly enjoyable experience. Think creamy smoothie that’ll get ya drunk. Mmmmmmmm… There are also hop varietals that naturally give off a wonderful citrus palate in properly balanced IPA’s so they might be your gateway beer into a much hoppier existence. Look for beers that boast the copious use of citra, simcoe, and/or mosaic hops and you will be at a glorious starting point. 

Wine drinker? Do ya like the jaw straining delight of biting into a lemon? Were you addicted to the drool inducing Sour Patch Kids or Warheads in your yute (or yooouuuuuth)? Or are you just a sour sumumabitch? Then might I suggest a sour beer? It is what it is, a beer that has been introduced to elements with the intention to pucker your cheeks… on your face sicko. No other beer is scrutinized over the subtleties like a sour beer. The sour is overpowering at times so it takes a skilled (and lets face it, bonkers) mind to create something palatable and enjoyable. These took me awhile to get into and appreciate for what they were so it astonishes me when someone who is not into beer tries a sour and brightens up with excitement exclaiming, “Ooh, I like that…” I laugh in disbelief and request that they swear to god. They swear. I’m the asshole. If you’ve tried everything else and still don’t like “beer” then this might be the one you’re looking for. Give something a try from The Rare Barrel, de Garde, Almanac, Prairie, or anything from your local wild ale production facility and possibly, just maybe, so you’re telling me there’s a chance, blow your mind. 

Maybe you need a first love like I did. The Germans gave me that and opened a blitzkrieg upon my world when I discovered their liquid history. An average legitimate German Weisse beer is better than just about every domestic macro crap you will find on the abundant (paid for by the Three-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named) shelf space. Along with a sweet and spicy Belgian beer you may be on your way to being internationally sophisticated. Or just drunk (remain Upright). The spirit of Oktoberfest is what enticed me and I have been cultured ever since. 

So if you’re tired of taking shots, or maybe you hit the margarita wall and can’t even look at a tequila bottle anymore without the involuntary spasm, then don’t be afraid to look elsewhere, like the noticeably smaller section of beer at your local store, pick out a few different styles of beer and realize that you’ve been brainwashed by Clydesdales and the Rocky Mountains. By catchphrases and fancy color changing cans. By grammatically incorrect spellings of the word “lite” and images of people having a good time at a bar holding bottles with red and white labels (if you’ve been to a bar lately, did you notice anyone in this scenario? Me neither). There’s a big beautiful world out there, come join us sometime…

Reflections: Another Year In Craft Beer Pt. 2

Posted on by oahuzer0

My apologies. Had to take a break after my little rant about the Black Label Hopocalypse release. But now I am back with a couple more opinionated jabs at my favorite libation… Coors Light. Ha! Even typing that I couldn’t do it with a straight face! But seriously though, here we go with…

Honorable Mentions

Russian River Brewing Company

First off, I want to thank Russian River Brewing out of Santa Rosa, CA for keeping it real. That’s right, I said keeping it real, because throughout the years and many trips to their pub there is one thing that I can honestly say has never happened. I have NEVER been disappointed. They are the most consistent, unwavering, always gonna have a helluva good time kind of place, and in the hearts of the craft beer enthusiasts that is a treasure. This years Pliny the Younger, just as good as last years. I would actually say better considering that this year I knew what to expect and was still blown away. Amazed. Keep doing you brewbrew. 

Best New Brewery

Beer Lab HI

I may be biased with this one and I’m sure there are infinite amounts of new breweries throughout the country that deserve some accolades but my choice for this one is Beer Lab HI on the island of Oahu. The truest spirit of craft beer is alive and well at this year old house of hops. Passion and excitement, science and smiles, there is a stool waiting for you to expand your palate and give you something to talk about henceforth with all. If you plan a trip to Hawaii, make this brewery part of your itinerary. You will not be sorry. 

Biggest Let Down Beer 

The Beet Gose On

So, inevitably there were going to be some beers that didn’t live up to the hype, the expectations, the dream within a dream… Okay, so maybe not that dramatic but when it comes to our beers, it can get serious. At a local beerfest in Eugene,OR I noticed a beautifully colored beer in the hands of many floating through the crowd. The entire event I was searching for that beer. Which booth was it at? Who made it?! It’s coming down to the wire and I need that beer! Found it. The Beet Gose On by Agrarian Ales in Eugene. A beet beer? Sure, why not? Unlike Red Velvet from Ballast Point, the beet was more than a bit of food coloring for an otherwise tasty beverage. It seemed to play the lead in a one man show production of Titanic, sinking, ne’er to sail the open ocean of my palate ever again. It was blatantly beet juice, carbonated and apparently, if drank enough will get you drunk. The benefits though. Instead of being hungover you’d probably feel great the next day! I couldn’t imagine having even one more glass however. A valiant effort and points for thinking outside the tun, but some things are meant for the singular experience. Agrarian Ales is an amazing brewery. Their dedication to craft beer and using the best ingredients is unmatched almost anywhere, but this beautiful looking beer (and it looked gorgeous) will not be had again. 

Best Brewery of the Year

Its not about one beer. Its not about what your favorite beer might currently be. This is about a fire lit in the industry. A flame felt across the craft beer landscape that whether you liked the beer or not, you respect the heat and warm your toes by it. Locally here in Oregon specifically, a brewery that constantly ignites my passions and my internal warm and fuzzies is Block 15 Brewing out of Corvallis, OR. They have yet to release a beer that was less than outstanding, but the reach throughout the industry is just not there, yet. Other Half has been doing the same with just about everything they are brewing. Traders are doing their part to help the reach of this house of hops span the country, but as amazing as their beers are they tend to be a singular experience. So who is adding kindle to the flame? This decision will not be popular, but I stand by it with my liver in hand. The best brewery of the year, Sierra Nevada Brewing Co. out of Chico, CA. Lets forget about the fact that the first craft beer I can remember is their Pale Ale. Lets not bring up the fact that their seasonal beers are some of the most anticipated releases of the year such as their Celebration Ale during Christmas time. What about Hoptimum, one of the hoppiest beers this palate has ever experienced? Consider their Beer Camp series, the widespread collaboration celebration of some of the countries best breweries. Their barrel aged series, Trip In the Woods is fantastic and their Belgian Ovila series makes me feel very evil, Dr. Evil… Countless beers flow from this place throughout the year and I almost always have the thought, ”Thats new… Gotta try it.” Granted, not all of the beers are mind blowing, but all of them are consistently well done and well received. They have hit the mark so many times with beers like Ruthless Rye, Torpedo, Estate Homegrown, Flipside, the list goes on and on, and thats what you want from a brewery. Give me reliability, peace of mind that when I grab one of your beers, I am not going to be let down. Sierra Nevada makes a good beer, and are well traveled enough to be in any one of your hands at any given moment. They have elevated the craft beer community by not only promoting their own brand, but lifting many others through collaborations and creating a sense of solidarity that the macros will never have. Come to think of it, can you tell me any other consumer based product that can say the same? Because I can’t…

 Best Beer of the Year

I have received numerous responses to this question. Opinion after opinion, argument after argument, all pointing to the same conclusion predictably enough. If you ask 100 craft beer enthusiasts what the best beer is you’re most likely going to get 500 different answers, because that’s the world we live and drink in. To the stout drinker you’re going to hear that maybe Bourbon County is the best, or Prairie Bomb! To the IPA drinker you’re most likely going to hear a laundry list of Other Half, Tired Hands, Tree House, Alchemist, or any one of the East Coast breweries that are doing awesome beers these days. You’re going to have people claim that their local brewery has the best beer anywhere (I am guilty, Block 15, you my boys) and who is to say otherwise? Certainly not me and shame on anyone who does, because no matter what is in your hand, at that moment at any given time, that might be the best beer for you. We as a community understand that and are doing our part to spread the word across the country through trades, raffles, giveaways, like mini distribution companies. It’s a great time to be a beer drinker. There’s excitement coming home to a porch bomb of cross country libations that before you would’ve had to actually travel great distances to enjoy. I myself recently had my head turned by Tired Hands’ Extra Vanilla Double Milkshake, a beer that I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to try had not been for a raffle, that had me on the verge of being outwardly emotional. At that moment, it was the best beer that has ever been. But then again I might have been a little tips. I feel that the best is yet to come for us legions of thirsty. The next fad will flood the palates of the land and set our livers ablaze and the discussion will start again. From now on, when someone asks me what I think the best beer of the year is, I am going to say without hesitation, all of them. Cheers brewthren!

Since my last post, there have been some new developments in the search for the elusive Black Label Hopocalypse. Through social media it appears that just about anything can be acquired. I put the feelers out for a loose bottle of the white whale and after a few weeks I got a nibble. My faith was shaken, until the day I got the response that a bottle was available, and within a couple weeks I was holding it like the baby Jesus. I am excited beyond belief, and hold no animosity towards Drake’s Brewing. I have the one beer that took three years to get. I am at peace…

Reflections: Another Year in Craft Beer Pt. 1

Posted on by oahuzer0

Another year has passed, and we are again lost in the ethers of what was. The craft beer world saw outstanding variations of all beer styles that sent our palates to the heavens, and occasionally to the drain. It is time to honor the honorable, to reflect once again on the best, the most desired, the Rare, the beers that were like a beautiful sunset for our livers. And now, without further ado… 

Biggest Surprise Beer(s) of the Year

There is almost nothing better than to be completely blown away by a beer you’ve never had before. Expectations surpassed, sensory notes at full tingle and excitement, all after your first sip of a beer that you only know from the words on the menu board. There were two beers this year that showed me that I can still be taken to that special place in my hop shaped heart, which brings me to the first one, the Heart Shaped Box from Oakshire Brewing out of Eugene, OR. HSB was a bourbon barrel aged imperial stout with cocoa nibs, cherries, espresso, and vanilla beans. Now I can hear you saying it already. “Really? A BBA imperial stout? How’s was that a surprise?” Those of you who have noticed that you are never lacking in choice when it comes to a bourbon barrel aged anything these days know that when one is unique it stands out just a little further on that ledge. This one stepped to the edge and jumped off, confident that it could fly. The aromas were thick with coffee and cocoa while the palate backed it up with a sweet and velvety smoothness from the cherries and vanilla bean. No hype, no warning, just a lasting impression. 


Beerfests are always great venues to find those diamonds in the rough. Brewers bring out their secret weapons or smaller experimental batch beers that excite, and honestly, sometimes greatly disappoint. But disappointed I was not after trying Sunriver Brewing’s Sweet Mosquito On Fire. Their IPA Vicious Mosquito is a decent representation of the style but lacked the something that would make it extraordinary. SMOF, takes the VM and uses habanero and mango to enhance the ordinary, giving it that little extra. Sculpin threw habanero peppers in and it disrupted the balance of the force. Along with the mango which makes for a perfect marriage to the spice, the habanero helps bring everything back into balance. High praise. 

Best Variations and Manipulations

Sculpin has its grapefruit, pineapple, and habanero. Dogfish Head has their 60, 90, and 120 Minute IPA’s and Oskar Blues has Ten Fidy driving people crazy. Brewers take leaps of faith when they tinker with their classics and in some cases they make absolute magic. Prairie Artisan Ales had lightning in a bottle when they created “Bomb!” with its so-much-going-on mouthfeel and aromas that one wonders how you can pack any more punch for the palate. They have decided to create a Bomb! for every occasion whether it be a birthday, Christmas, a pirate party, or just a chilly night by the fire with a whiskey snifter. What sets this variation-healthy beer apart is that the base beer, while brimming with flavor notes that push your palate to its apparent limits, doesn’t allow for other additions to change what it is. You know you are having a Bomb! and anything else is just another layer of personality that define the moment that you’re living in. A beer for the “whenever” in your life, thats the “Bomb!”.

Most Anticipated Beer of the Year (2017)

I’ve had the Younger. I’ve had the Topper of Heady. 120 Minute? Check. I’ve been deep into the dark and the light of Other Half. But there is one that had alluded me, yet again. I missed out on Drakes Brewing’s Black Label Hopocalypse last year and the year before literally by minutes and now, this year as well and I am very pissed off. Moving on, I thought to myself that sure enough, I will be able to get it this year. Its the one I can’t stop thinking about, the one that keeps getting away, so what would another year of craft beer consumption be without the soul crushing disappointment of losing out on “The One Beer”. A social media post confirms my worst fear, the Black Label will be delayed. Not only delayed, but futures will ONLY sold on one day, a week before I am able to brave the air in flight in hopes to get there in time for it. I was (am) upset, so I went on to their post and voiced my displeasure with their handling of the situation. Their response was a bland sorry that I couldn’t make the bottle release and that they would have it on tap later on in the month. This helps me not. I love Drake’s beer, but I can’t help but feel a little disillusioned with them. I’m sure that will fade with time and beers, but right now the middle finger is stuck in its Upright position…

To be continued…

The Constants

Posted on by oahuzer0

Things don’t always go according to plan. If you’re foolish enough to think you have any control over life and the turbulent world around you then you might be infected with ignorance, or an acute case of hope. But what makes this life manageable are the things that never go away, the joyous slices of everyday that are yours, and only yours, the constants.

 The ever reliable, small doses of world shielding bits of crack that get us through, and to the next day. I saw a future that I wanted. There was a future that made sense in a whimsical Hollywood kind of way, and blinded by hope I made the dive head first into the puddle I thought was the ocean. Crawling out broken and bleeding, I think you would agree, its time for a beer. My constant. My inspiration. My captain, my captain. My constant. In good times and bad, I can take a minute to myself and get lost in the nuances of a simple beverage made of water, grains, hops, and yeast. Of passion, love, time, and inspiration. Self pity running rampant and a particularly nasty case of self loathing aside, I reach for something local. Like really local. Like five minutes down the street, might as well be my backyard, local. A Ninkasi Brewing Beer Run distracts from today’s solitude, and I thank them for it. Like Dogfish Head, Ninkasi has what seems to be a proprietary taste profile when it comes to their hoppy offerings. Beer Run is a big bitter beast of a beer that boasts the rights to brag. At 80 IBU’s it is right in their wheelhouse and 7.3% ABV is nothing to shake your liver at. 7.75/10 on the UrD. 

On the way back from a day running monotonous and time consuming errands, the plan was to head home and eat dinner, maybe do a little laundry. A wrong turn seems more like providence and I happen upon a brewery tucked away like a sniper ready to take his kill shot. Oakshire Brewing stands in plain sight of the world, making great beer, and doesn’t beg for attention. Any somewhat sloping outlook on life is almost always made better by a trip to a brewery, so with little to no hesitation I find myself parked and ordering The Perfect Storm Double IPA at the bar. With mountainous aromas of pine and bananas the rest of the world melts away and I’m lost in the glow of the snifter. Every bit of this sipper is a distraction of joy as the band plays and the crowd drinks, all is right in the world while I am deep in the hop coma. Oakshire delivers a lovely smile and this one is an 8.5/10 on the UrD scale. 

No matter the obstacle, I always try to stick to the plan, but the plan is an illusion. The only way around life’s uncertainties is to grab the infrequent opportunities for happy little hoppy moments and hold them close. One day the scales will shift back again and the good times will outnumber the bad, and maybe the gray that is the outline of the world will be silver again, but in the now, and in the further down the road, I’ll have a beer with you, and everything will be alright. Now is that ignorance, or hope? I can’t even tell anymore…

Reflection, A Year In Craft Beer

Posted on by oahuzer0

It’s been quite the ride. Another year gone and the oceans of craft beer from the past 12 months surges it’s way into memory and some into oblivion. This blog if anything for me is all about recollection, whether it be about experiences or simply tastes that stood the test of time in the otherwise spotted rinse cycle that is my memory. In honor of those that deflected forgetfulness this year, I have decided to have the first ever “Upright Drunk Best/Worst of Awards…Show…Ceremony…Thing”… Keep in mind that anything you read in this blog is completely self serving and though I value your outlook on craft beer, life, Donald Trump… I take that last one back… my opinions are just that, mine. So if you agree or if I have inspired you to make your own list, awesome. If you gonna hate, well, as a good friend of mine once said, “Bitches gonna bitch…” Aaaaaand here are our categories for…….

Biggest Surprise Beer of the Year goes to (drum roll)… Ballast Point Brewing’s Calm Before the Storm. So what’s the surprise you might say. It’s Ballast Point, and one should almost always expect greatness. And I do, but like the Grapefruit Sculpin the year before, I was not prepared for the curve ball that had me swinging for the fences with CBtS. They are slick over there in sunny San Diago (I know it’s Diego… Anchorman joke) and they hit you with a dark beer expectation being that it is obviously related to that gem of a brew in Victory at Sea. So imagine my surprise when my flight of Ballast Point brews from the nights tap takeover yields a light hued creamy sumbitch batting cleanup. “WTF is that?” I exclaimed. That my friends was a cream ale with coffee and vanilla. That was my mind blown all over the north facing wall. That, was craft beer revelation. 

Biggest Surprise Let Down of the Year goes to… and its a tie. Now before I divulge this pair of “Why did I put this in my mouth?” total disappointments, I have to preface that there may be a very good reason for my utter displeasure that may or may not have a chance for redemption in the future, but for now they are burnt into memory as they were. First the Molotov Lite from Evil Twin Brewing. Beer in a can? Hell yes. Evil Twin Brewing? Again, yes. What heinous aromas released I was not expecting and as first impressions go, this was not good. Expectations were high due to my adoration for its big brother the Molotov Cocktail, a 13% ABV behemoth of an Imperial IPA brewed with the amazing Simcoe hop (and just), so it had a long way to fall. And fall it did. Moving on to the next bit of heartache this year. The Stochasticity Project: HiFi+LoFi Mixtape from Stone Brewing. Now before you grab your torch and pitchforks allow me to explain. Like the Molotov Lite, the aromas were immediately off-putting and the sediment in this one was very unattractive. The flavor was bitter in a non hop forward kind of way. This one, like the ML, I believe was introduced to some beer spoilers. Infections kill beers, and it goes to show that even the most coveted breweries are not exempt from the infiltration of those terrorist microbes. Maybe one day I will give them another shot, but it may take some convincing.

Barrel Aged Reflections and Honorable Mentions

It almost seemed this year that you couldn’t throw a bottle cap without hitting a barrel aged something or other coming out of every brewery. I’m not complaining of course. The nuances that the barrel adds to our brews either make or break an experience. Here are some of my favorites from this past year, barrel aged and otherwise. Goose Island hits us again with yet another amazing variety of Bourbon County Brand Stouts that define the genre. Honestly, I do not know of anyone who does it better and more consistently than the Goose. Clown Shoes rocked some palates this year with a couple barrel aged sumbitches that caused for a standing ovation. The Crasher in the Rye will leave you exhaling some serious fumes. Stay away from open flame. Rexx, the imperial red ale that was aged in bourbon barrels is a game changer and unique to experience. You can’t talk about barrel aged beers this year and not mention some of the palate manipulators at Deschutes. Anytime I pick up one of their wax dipped wonders I turn in to a little kid waiting for Christmas. They gave me The Abyss, Black Butte anniversary (any year), The Stoic, Not The Stoic for hops sake. Jubel, The Dissident, Mirror Mirror, the list can make a grown man, well to be honest, very drunk, but hopefully upright. A steady diet of Pliny the Elder was my pleasure along with a lucky happening upon the very special Heady Topper. Amazing IPA’s that will always be at the top of the heap. If you can find yourself one of those then jump on it along with a Silva Stout from Green Flash and Southern Charred from Arrogant Bastard Brewing (apparently not Stone Brewing anymore). Barrel aging is showing no sign of going away and should probably be its own category. 

Best Brewery

Everyone has their favorite brewery that is ingrained in the souls and livers of all that partake in the craft beers. This is not a sentimental pick for Best Brewery of the Year. This is based on the experiences that this brewery has provided consistently this year and every year for that matter. Without further adieu, The Upright Drunk’s pick for Brewery of the Year is Ballast Point Brewing and Spirits. More than one tap takeover in these islands gave us an intimate look at the BP lineup. They amped up their production of the Grapefruit Sculpin and shocked the world with the expectations shattering Calm Before the Storm. They jumped on the session IPA bandwagon with their interpretation called Even Keel which packs a hop punch on par with the bigger ABV boys. They pioneered their Homework Series which highlights the home brewing achievements of the deserving. Then I’ll be damned if they didn’t hit me with some sour brews that knocked my socks off, if I were wearing socks at the time. They brought back Victory at Sea with a vengeance and for the first time in Hawaii we actually got to celebrate Victory at Sea Day where the peanut butter, toasted coconut, and peppermint variations made their way here for our enjoyment. Along with the classics that they pump out every year I can’t think of another brewery that is as consistent and fulfilling as this San Diego house of hops. What else would you expect from a billion dollar brewery?

Most Anticipated Beer of 2016

What do we have to look forward to this year? Craft breweries have pushed the boundaries of barrel aging and have squeezed every last bit of lupulin out of the hop, so what can possibly get this heart muscle thumping? Dogfish Head has promised to up the production of my favorite brew, 120 Minute IPA, and with Arrogant Bastard going out on its own we can definitely expect some punishing brews from them. I am very much looking forward to getting my mitts on a Hopocolypse Black Label from Drakes Brewing but there is one above all that has me on the edge of my seat. I will be in Santa Rosa, CA this February for the white whale brew known as Pliny the Younger. It takes but a mild suggestion from a friend, barely a whisper and plans have been set in motion to brave the air in flight to the welcoming doors of Russian River Brewing. I have no words for the anticipation. This is what “The Search” is all about.

Best Beer of the Year

And finally, the Best Beer of the Year. This was a hard one. It was like trying to choose what my favorite breath of air was this year, quite literally there were a number of beers that made me feel alive. The one this last year though, that is still a reoccurring bit of lust in the liver, was the versatile, ever expanding, end all be all beer of 2015, Hopocolypse from Drakes Brewing Company out of San Leandro, CA. I raved about my visit to Drakes this year in February and have been fondly reciting it’s glories all year. They served a barrel fermented version at the brewery that was just another version of awesome. Their Black Label version is on the high anticipation list for this coming year and I will not rest until it is had. 

Thank you all for coming along with me on this journey through the brew landscape of 2015. I have nothing but high hopes for this year to come so get out there and support your local breweries because that is where you are going to inspire the ones who will one day brew the best beer you’ve ever had. Cheers brewthren.